Descent

       "Absence diminishes mediocre passions and increases great ones, as the wind extinguishes candles and fans fires." - Francois de La Rochefoucauld 

      

       There is a slim, almost non-existent chance that I unknowingly perpetrated a vile deception when I promised to pen down my brilliant flashes of inspiration and self-deprecation until their number reached thirty – an epic, monumental achievement that still dwells beyond my grasp.

       I have been an absentee from the virtual world of self-centred writings for such a long time, because I felt that my life was descending into utter chaos. Which it was... Worry not, I found a solution to that particular glaring issue – I ceased to have free time, thus bringing my negative thoughts and emotions to an all-time low.

       Yet... Whatever I do, however much I mock this world and delude my poor self, there is this incredible absence – a bottomless pit within my soul, if I may say so.

       There is a person who, while the reason for that specific hurting, is also the only one who can make it better. Whenever she leaves, I feel less myself, less... Just less.

       And all I can do is wait.     

The Core Duality

   

Emotion by Armandsg

“But some emotions don't make a lot of noise. It's hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint - like a heartbeat. And pure love - why, some days it's so quiet, you don't even know it's there.” - Author Unknown

       I have always prided myself on my ability to bend words to my will, to bend them into monolithic, coherent, solid and meaningful shapes that may bear across space and time the emotion I felt, writing those words.
       Indeed, it is emotion – that momentary, fleeting, ethereal flash of inspiration – that is the source of it all, the origin of both writing ideas and the motivation to actually sit down and write. And I have always felt, even when it had seemed to me that such was not the case.
       Yesterday, I realised a rather important something about life, the universe and all that stuff. It is obligatory to have that core of raw feeling within you, even if it is buried somewhere so deep you cannot perceive it at all. I have already shared my belief that, in this life, we often think too little...
       But often – perhaps too often – we think too much, as well.

Unassuming

     "People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid." - Soren Aabye Kierkegaard

       I am – and have been as of late – deeply and profoundly tired. Exhausted, even. Both physically and mentally.

       It is because I am certain that you are, at the moment, burning with an unquenchable desire to know the full extent of the myriad of unfortunate occurrences that form the reason for my state of being utterly knackered, I shall – as ever, without further a due – explain...

       I am so bloody tired by people who think they’re always right. People who question the verity of neither their premise, nor their conclusions – however unfounded, unreasonable and untrue those may be.

       There. I have finally vocalised my objections. Rather unassuming ones, wouldn’t you agree? (This time only, of course.)

       Ah, how light is life without a burden to rest upon your soul... Or maybe not.

Frequency Shift

       "Change is inevitable - except from a vending machine." - Robert C. Gallagher


       After nearly a month of daily wordiness, I would like to believe that I have (to some extent) established a few of my most fundamental ideas. I hope you have found in them something more than empty thoughts.
       I am writing this rather brief post to announce that when I reach the number of thirty (30) posts, I shall continue to pen down my random thoughts and to share them with you, my dear, vociferous readers. However, there will be an inevitable change in the frequency of those posts.
       For a great number of reasons, after the first month, I will only write one post every week – rather than one each day.
       And perhaps you will still read them. 

The Deceptive Vista

       "The popularity of conspiracy theories is explained by people's desire to believe that there is - some group of folks who know what they're doing." - Damon Knight


       When confronted with many an existential dilemma, the most common and least baffling fault we humans usually are possessed of is the great likelihood that a transference of blame will occur – in essence, we like to point our finger towards anyone but ourselves. And we all know that's the probable source of any specific conundrum.
       Thus, conspiracy theories were born. And they persisted, and evolved, and became a permeating, poisonous part of our otherwise charming and tranquil world. (Do ignore the gale of venom-dripping sarcasm, I beg you. Addendum: I might have forgotten to warn you at the beginning of the post about the great chance of the aforementioned facets of my writing style today.)
       The most troubling aspect, I think, of our fascination with global conspiracies is that it undermines the chances of a truer and clearer perception of the real problems with which we are faced as a species. It is only logical that there are those who find the current situation comfortable (and profitable, I'm sure). If such was not the case, people would not be encouraged to such great extent by the mass media and various cultural mediums (books, films, magazines, etc.) to believe there is a grand conspiracy afoot.
       I might be wrong... 
       Yet, that is what I see, when I take a brief look around. And I marvel at the thought that, apparently, the current predominant paradigm is not comfortable only to those few who attain greater wealth and power by its propagation. On the contrary, the deceptive vista that is set before our eyes to better hide the steel bars would seem to be sufficiently satisfactory and surprisingly soothing to such a great number of people... 
       Indeed, to most people.

Absence

       "Don't be dismayed at goodbyes, a farewell is necessary before you can meet again and meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends." - Richard Bach


       Today is not a good day... For various reasons, I have none of the mental acuity that is usually in my possession. I shall be brief.
       It is hard to say goodbye to a friend, and I think it does not become any less devastating with repetition. Such has been my experience thus far, at least. And I do believe I have had a large enough number of farewells in my life to be in a position to pass judgement. (I shall say again that, as ever, I may be wrong about all of this.)
       I do know, however, that there are few more heart-warming moments, than when you meet a person close to you after a long absence. It is always something to look forward to with great impatience and trembling hope. 

Frontier of Dreams

       "We need men who can dream of things that never were..." - John F. Kennedy


       "Imagination is more important than knowledge." - Albert Einstein


       "Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were..." - Dr. Carl Sagan


       I was pondering the implications of the wide-spread, gangrenous, highly contagious malleability of the human mind in the world today – the comfortable cage we have fashioned for ourselves...
       The only logical conclusion I could approach, without the hazard of my head exploding, was that there is an apparent tendency to suppress creativity, imagination, individual perceptions and the general will to attain cognitive processes – the system is brilliantly predicated on the baffling necessity we humans have to try to imitate established social norms and to bow to common wisdom.
       It is for that very reason that I have taken upon myself the grand responsibility to attempt to convince – by verbal abuse, most likely –  some of you that the three great men I quoted at the beginning of today's rambling session are, indeed, correct in their presumptions. Of course, I shall let you reach your own conclusions and make your individual decisions – that is, after all, the very reason I am writing all of this.
       I have said repeatedly that we have to learn to think for ourselves, rather than conform to social guidelines. This is, naturally, far from a statement that society is an artificial and unnecessary construct – I actually believe it is fundamental to our sustainability as a species. (Even if there are some fascinating aspects of the current political and socio-economic order that are a tremendous waste of our time.) 
       Therefore, I shall not delve deeper into that particular subject. Actually, I think I had something quite different to say. Ah, yes... I simply want to believe that at some moment in the future, there will be enough people who will have let their imagination guide them to a state of equilibrium for our species.
       Also, this should happen soon – before we blow ourselves up, please.

On Seeming and Being...

“You see, there’s a fundamental connection between seeming and being.” - Patrick Rothfuss

A deeply tragic, yet integral and inevitable part of our lives is that, no matter how great our efforts to avoid and elude it, we all pretend to be something other than what we are – to be what is often demanded of us.

We pretend...

But there is an underlying danger to pretence. Seeming to be is the easiest and most alluring path to becoming. Humanity has seen this repeatedly, this simple fact has become an inseparable aspect of what we perceive our roles as individuals should be.

We know masks are dangerous. We know that if you pretend to believe or to be something for a certain period of time, you shall, eventually, believe it with all your heart and realise you are now someone else. Indeed, we know everything about masks...

Yet, we also possess a wonderful proficiency, a peculiar, inexplicable ability to know how to ignore the lessons we have learned.

My dear, vociferous readers, have you wondered lately about the mask you have chosen?

Paradigm Alteration

Warning!

This post shall constitute a rambling, extravagant flurry of words, which may or may not – depending on the light, I guess – demonstrate verily any part of what is to be discussed. There will be an attempt, however, to hold to certain ethical standards, such as objectivity, balance of presentation, etc. I shall most likely fail to achieve that. (Also, this might just spoil your lovely day.)

You have been warned.

“Nothing is more dangerous than an idea when it is the only one you have.” - Emile Chartier

Fear not, my dear, vociferous, readers, I do not intend to frighten or disappoint, or insult. My objective on this special day is rather simple – I shall continue to speak about Ideas.

When I say that, I refer to Ideas as the all-embracing concept of eternal, enduring, exhilarating epiphanies our species has come to depend on so greatly. We are not wrong to do that, I believe...

However, too often we forget. We need to harness Ideas – too often we presume to possess complete and perfect understanding. We flaunt our utterly unfounded notions and present them as facts, without any prior deep examination of all aspects of the issue at hand, without any inherent logic to our statements...

We need critical thinking, if we are to harness the true power and develop the full potential of our most precious Ideas. We need to admit the possibility of being wrong... Imagine, for a brief moment at least, where our species would be now, if we could all think before we speak.

This is a truly remarkable dream, I’m certain you’ll agree. I shall always wonder if it will be possible one day to make it our reality.

A Slight Detour

Lately, I have been involved in several engaging discussions of the origin of ideas – and more precisely, the origin of writing ideas and topics and the apparent difficulty in finding them.

Even though I would be the first one to admit the possibility of my fascinating predisposition to be mistaken, I am not in accord with the aforementioned theory.

I do, in fact, believe that ideas are rather easy to uncover from within the depths of our endless souls. It is shaping – indeed, forging – them into a vision of wisdom, beauty and hope that’s so bloody hard.

Ask any writer...

Keepers of Time

 I love sunny days – there is no better way, in my humble opinion, to appreciate how swiftly life moves past us than to stop and think for a brief instant on a day like this one. You most certainly shall reach a moment when you realise that the day has sped by at a fantastic pace. And you will wonder, I hope, about your place in the raging currents of the flows of Time.

We, humans... We understand how important that elusive concept truly is. As I have already said, despite the obvious fact that we are the ones who developed the notion of ‘time’, we are brilliant at letting it slip through our fingers. Yet, we are simultaneously outstanding time-keepers...

It is indeed a strange paradox of a predicament we find ourselves in – today we may be able to measure Time like never before, but we have also discovered an ostensibly infinite variety of activities in our endeavour to waste Time. (My current activity is, naturally, excluded from that list, don’t you agree?)

To elaborate any further would be redundant, superfluous and generally malicious, which I strive rather hard not to be. I shall, therefore, conclude this rude interruption of what you perceive as important in life with one final, judgemental, narcissistic, condescending and generally malicious statement. (I failed, I admit.)

Don’t waste your Time.

Mythological Conundrum

“Humans live through their myths and only endure their realities.” - Robert Anton Wilson

I shall begin by saying that I hope my last post consisted mostly of the person L.B. being wrong about being wrong. I do need to believe there are more people like you...

And now, moving on to the first (and, to your great relief, final) item on today’s agenda – the enduring influence of myths on our lives in this sad, little, yet oddly fascinating century.

There is, however, a slight conundrum with which I am faced. I feel the sudden inexplicable urge to not be verbose and violently vivid in my pursuit of Veritas – ergo, I shall be brief.

Myths shape us both as individuals and as societies. They live within us and we persevere under their guiding light. Our myths play a pivotal role in our interpretations of this humble universe. Perhaps too much so...

The truth remains... I am disappointed that the world is not run by those who forge our greatest, most inspiring and most comforting visions.

Faulty Numbers

I hereby pronounce the person L.B. guilty of being unbelievably wrong.

(audible sighs of sorrow/expansive cheers of evil)

And now there remains only the truly unremarkable question – wrong about what, precisely? Perhaps you have already presented your detail-oriented, intelligent, analytical persona with that charming and immensely fascinating little mystery.

As always, I shan’t keep you guessing... I was wrong – dead wrong – about a number.

It would seem that there are not, in actuality, enough smart, thoughtful, kind, good-natured, sensitive and sensible people on Earth. At least, not enough to snatch our failure of a species back from irreversible decline and inevitable decay.

Congratulations to the rest of us! We are doomed...

We Do...?

I have found it hard to maintain my concentration on this lovely day. The natural consequence of which is that my writing is far from its otherwise insufferable impeccable quality. Also, I think my head might explode, so I shall conclude this as swiftly as possible.

Have you reached the rather logical conclusion that there is an inherent ambiguity to being a decent person, while simultaneously participating in the ‘civil society’ paradigm? Or, if I may paraphrase, have you noticed that our world is full of hypocrites?

I might be wrong, as I love to and shall continue to repeat. But I’m just going to be a hypocrite and say that each and every one of the (insert huge number here) people on our planet is, to some extent at least, living in delusion.

People lie.

I do.

You do. 
         We all do.

Admit it... Well, that wasn’t so difficult, was it? All right. Moving on...

The fascinating aspect of lying – to my twisted soul, that is – is not the attempt to deceive others, but rather the tendency of most conscientious people to try to lie to themselves. (I obviously consider myself amongst those poor creatures.)

Lying to others is messy, hard, illogical business. Deluding yourself is tremendously worse. And it often leads to what we like to call ‘experience’. (Which, sadly, often seems to be just another word for ‘mistake’ these days.)

I shall now leave you and commence to gain enough experience to reach higher levels of understanding. And maybe learn something useful. (Although, I must admit – I don’t like the odds of that happening.)

Delineation

“If you tremble indignation at every injustice, then you are a comrade of mine.” - Ernesto ‘Che’ Guevara

I have always marvelled at the verity and passion behind these words. Every time my studies have led me to the story of this great person, I have stopped to ponder, to seek something more.
       Did he wonder, did he doubt at least for a moment the rightfulness of the course he had taken? I might not embrace his ideology (or any other for that matter), but I shall not cease to admire his dedication to it...

I mentioned studies and I feel that I should elaborate – after all, it seems to be much important to this world what, rather than who, you are. And I am a student of the fine and despicable art of Politics. ( Yet another brilliant mess we humans have stirred up for ourselves.)

I am by no means an expert in any aspect of my chosen field of learning. Which, when I consider it further, may not be such a terrible hindrance to my so obviously omniscient persona. However, on a more serious note, it is a good thing – my brain has not been completely formatted to conform to acceptable standards... Yet.

This makes it possible for me to examine all political, economic and societal models we have adopted through the millennia (including the current dominant paradigm) from a very interesting perspective. I have come to know them, and so I reject them all, even if no one will be any the wiser. For my opinion is of no consequence. I am a single human being, and my ideas – no matter how stirring and true – could remain pure and unbent only within the confines of my mind.

Nevertheless, I have chosen to share some of my truths with you. And I have found little in all my time of reading that I consider to the benefit of humanity. (I might be wrong, as I love to repeat.) There are very few ideas, of those that are situated within the prevalent socio-economic order, which I would dub great...

Actually, at this moment, I can only think of one – Utilitarianism, an ethical theory by the great thinker and philosopher John Stuart Mill. It postulates that the political establishment shall strive to maximise the ‘good’ for the greatest possible part of society. A lovely idea, yet one doomed to failure within the boundaries we have set for ourselves.

I shall now, for another brief moment, presume to know what is right and what is wrong and say that we need something truly different, entirely new. (End of narcissistic, self-aggrandising part of the post.)

… I wonder what I should say now...

(This paragraph intentionally left blank.)

(End of post.)

To Be Continued...

       Worry not, my dear, vociferous readers. I shall bring you more of my endless wisdom very soon.

A Fool's Hope

There was never much hope for a blog consisting of cheerful, light, jolly, entertaining posts. I realise that now.

I was aware, of course, that this venture would require a certain degree of randomness (which I seem to possess in startling quantities) and humour (which I am not yet sure if I have mastered). I did know all this prior to the writing of my first post.

However, I had failed to anticipate how much my writing would be influenced by my affinity for solemn thought and philosophical reflection and by my excessive bitterness. I do have far too much of the latter... Yet, I am quite certain that you appreciate the great extent to which I have shared my person with you through these thoughts and opinions, and critiques, and condemnations.

This is who I am.

Of course, I can seek the light, the humorous in any given moment – when this is required of me. I can seem to be unfailingly positive and calm, and optimistic, and redundantly exuberant.

But... There is a difference between seeming and being. And I shall not become the mask I have to wear.